Today was our final growth scan! Possibly our final ultrasound ever, honestly! We will probably have one at the hospital before the c-section, but this was the final big one. She of course didn’t cooperate at all, and we weren’t able to see her face. We did see everything else that we needed and she is now (34 weeks) measuring in the 83rd percentile at 5 lbs 15oz! I wanted to see her face so badly, but she’s just nestled in so tight that it was impossible.

She passed her NST as well. I love listening to her heart beat on the monitor. I could listen to it all day; as long as she’s moving its very relaxing to me. After everything was done, I met with my Dr for a little bit. There’s nothing to really talk about when we meet, so just a formality really. So we have 6 NSTs left; 21 days.  I can’t even believe it.

I ordered a few things for Rowan the other day. I bought her a onesie for the hospital, a hat that is adorable, and a blanket that has her name on it. I bought a newborn insert for the halo bassinet as well. Alden hated sleeping in it with nothing around her; I think it wasn’t “secure” enough for her. Too much wide open space and she wanted to be cuddled up.

I cannot believe there will be another baby in our home so soon. It really doesn’t even still feel real. I’ve been feeling really guilty about Kenley lately. Just the would have and should haves that I’m sure most mothers feel after their child dies. It’s like with each subsequent pregnancy I thought maybe it would feel different, but I was way wrong. It still feels like I’m leaving her behind.